...and so this is Christmas...
This is going to be a very interesting Christmas. I'm going to be changing my tradition that I've had basically since birth. It's Maya's first Christmas. There's not going to be a Christmas Eve / Festivus with Tacos. Hmm... It makes one think.
I truly believe that your close friends are the family that you choose. It's been a crazy year with the pregnancy and all, and the people who were right there with me through it all were my internal family, and my dear friends. I'm still having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that my external family is breaking up. After my grandmother died it seemed that we all shed our pretenses. I don't think necessarily that she was the "glue" that held the family together, but I do think that people put on facades to make it seem that everything was ok. It hasn't been ok in a long time. The people I spend Christmas day with every year are strangers to me. I thought for sure that I knew them, but now that I am an adult I know that I don't. The people who I thought they were were kind, and caring, full of love and laughter, and were always there to back eachother up as family should are not that at all. It's a shame. They were all so tied up in their own messes that they couldn't take a time out to greet a brand new member to the family. I try not to be angry about it, it's not their fault that they are so selfish. I just know that I can't be there for them. Again, they have become strangers.
...It's going to be a strange Christmas.
I truly believe that your close friends are the family that you choose. It's been a crazy year with the pregnancy and all, and the people who were right there with me through it all were my internal family, and my dear friends. I'm still having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that my external family is breaking up. After my grandmother died it seemed that we all shed our pretenses. I don't think necessarily that she was the "glue" that held the family together, but I do think that people put on facades to make it seem that everything was ok. It hasn't been ok in a long time. The people I spend Christmas day with every year are strangers to me. I thought for sure that I knew them, but now that I am an adult I know that I don't. The people who I thought they were were kind, and caring, full of love and laughter, and were always there to back eachother up as family should are not that at all. It's a shame. They were all so tied up in their own messes that they couldn't take a time out to greet a brand new member to the family. I try not to be angry about it, it's not their fault that they are so selfish. I just know that I can't be there for them. Again, they have become strangers.
...It's going to be a strange Christmas.
Post a Comment